Three Strikes and You're Out - A Reflection on Paul's Letter to Philemon

 If he has wronged you at all, or owes you anything, charge that to my account.I, Paul, write this with my own hand: I will repay it ... Philemon 18-19a

Philemon 1–25 – Philemon
Sunday of Christmastide – December 31, 2023 (am)  

I.               Introduction:

It is 11:45 on the evening of December 31 and she has been on her feet for one year. She still holds her head high, but she is tired. Her dress is worn, and her shoes are serviceable but clearly have seen better days. And her feet hurt!  She sits on a bench in the train station waiting for the last train of the evening to board, and also waiting for the arrival of her younger sister. She holds in her lap a cardboard box, an old-fashioned bandbox actually.  She is of course the representation of the year that has just passed in the short story The Sister Years by Nathaniel Hawthorne. 

And sure, enough as the train pulls into the station a young woman, a fair maiden who “bedizened with fluttering ribbons” as Hawthorne describes her descends with eager step to the platform.   She of course represents the New Year which is about to launch.  The two sisters greet each other.  Though only one year separates them, the chasm of time and circumstance between them feels more like a century.  The younger sister is eager to begin her journey, filled with hope and the desire to pass out the flowers in her basket to any and all she would happen to meet.  The older sister by contrast is eager to rest, and to reflect, her journey nearly complete.

The younger sister inquires about the contents of the band-box her older sibling is holding.  The older sister replies in these words:   

“These are merely a few trifles, replied the Old Year which I have picked up in my rambles and going to deposit in the receptacle of things past and forgotten.  We sisterhood of Years never carry anything really valuable out of the world with us.  Here are patterns of most of the fashions which I brought into vogue, and which have already lived out their allotted term.  You will supply their place with others equally ephemeral.  …. The tears of widows and other afflicted mortals who have received comfort during the past 12 months, are preserved in some dozens of essence bottles, well corked and sealed … Moreover, here is an assortment of many thousand broken promises, and other broken ware, all very light and packed into little space.  The heaviest articles in my possession are a large parcel of disappointed hopes which a little while ago were buoyant enough to have inflated Mr. Lauriat’s balloon.”

This dark little fable ends with the New Year maiden lightly tripping through the city streets handing out flowers to all who cry out to her as she passes, “Happy New Year.”  Yet she perceives that the air in which she walks though fresh and new and filled with confidence and wonder, is yet tainted even now by the unfolding troubles of the men and women and boys and girls and even babies that seem to march stride for stride alongside the beauty and gift of time!

Okay, kind of morbid I know, but this is a unique day, yes?  Many of us will stay up late to ring in the new year.  We will reflect on the old year and welcome the new one.   I remember well the turn of the century when 1999 became 2000 and so much of our conversation circled around the coming and dreaded Y2K.  Anybody remember this with me?  We had friends over and at the stroke of midnight, I had one of my sons go into the basement and shut off all the electrical circuits, plunging our gathering into total darkness for a few moments, fulfilling for an instant the dark prophecies of Y2K!!  That is how the new century began in our household!

Knowing that this is a unique day to both reflect and to anticipate, turn in your bibles to the little book of Philemon.  It comes just before Hebrews, just after Titus, in your pew bibles.  Most of us know the general outlines of this most personal and pointed of Paul’s letters.  It is in a nutshell a plea for mercy for a run-away slave.  There is much to commend this short letter to us on New Year’s Eve. Like us on this unique day, Paul looks back on what has happened in the past and yet points forward to some truly amazing possibilities.  It has another connection to us as well.  None of the characters named in this letter know how the story will end, and neither do we.  One day we may but for now we must leave the conclusion for another time and another place!  Let’s unpack it together!

II.              Examine the book: 

I intend to read this letter, breaking it into three sections:

1-7       The bond of friendship [A warm greeting]

8-16     The mirror of the gospel [Paul’s plea]

17-25     Until we meet again [blood brothers]

Before we open this little letter, I would like to give us some context.

Paul, who is imprisoned in Rome at the conclusion of the book of Acts finds himself in a strange spot.  He is both prisoner and host.  He is allowed to have friends come and go. [Read the last two chapters in the book of Acts.] He is allowed, forced actually, to provide for his own sustenance.  And he is ever anxious not for his person but certainly for the communities of believers he has nurtured like embers all along the path of his missionary journeys.  There are three additional characters in this story.  There is Philemon, an apparently wealthy Christian in the city of Colossae, approximately 100 miles due east of Ephesus. Colossae was a city of trade and cosmopolitan commerce that was in some decline even before this letter was written.  Its fate was sealed when Rome built the Ignatian Way which bypassed the city.  And to top it off, the city was destroyed by earthquake in A.D. 63 just a few years after Paul’s letter arrived.  Then there is Onesimus, about whom we know a few things, can infer a few more, but whose life and history are largely not available to us.  We know this, that he was a slave belonging to Philemon, that he somehow escaped or perhaps absconded likely while on an errand to Ephesus, that he encountered Paul somewhere along the way, possibly during Paul’s stay in Ephesus, or perhaps  during his two year imprisonment in Rome,  that he apparently owes a debt to Philemon, one that he cannot pay but one that Paul appears to personally guarantee.  We also know this interestingly, that he is tasked by Paul to accompany Tychicus in the delivery of the letters to the Ephesians, the Colossians and finally to Philemon.  The third character in the story, you ask?  That would be the church that met in Philemon’s house.  This is a public letter, intended to be read to the congregation, for the good of the congregation.  We will soon see why that is important.  With this as context, let’s begin:

A.    [1-8] The bond of friendship: I name it that because this greeting is not simply the pro forma standard opening to a letter.  Rather it sets the stage for the relationship between this prisoner [Paul] and his well-respected friend.

Paul, a prisoner for Christ Jesus, and Timothy our brother,

To Philemon our beloved fellow worker and Apphia our sister and Archippus our fellow soldier, and the church in your house:Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.I thank my God always when I remember you in my prayers, because I hear of your love and of the faith that you have toward the Lord Jesus and for all the saints, 6 and I pray that the sharing of your faith may become effective for the full knowledge of every good thing that is in us for the sake of Christ. For I have derived much joy and comfort from your love, my brother, because the hearts of the saints have been refreshed through you.

There are some things to note here:  First Paul does not refer to himself as an apostle, but as a prisoner.  Second notice that he addresses Philemon and two other individuals, [perhaps Philemon’s wife and son?]  But note who else is indicated … the church at Colossae that meets in Philemon’s house.

Next, notice that Paul is genuinely thankful for his colleague Philemon because even in prison Paul has had reports of the love this man has for him and for all the saints.

Verse six is interesting because it reads as if it is scrambled somehow.  It frankly sounds pretty spiritual, but it almost needs to be decoded. The NLT translation is helpful I think:

“And I am praying that you will put into action the generosity that comes from your faith as you understand and experience all the good things we have in Christ.”

Paul is praying for this man, that he would harness the unique privilege of generosity, that he would find and see the opportunities in front of him through the lens of his growing understanding and through his own personal experience of the mercies in Christ, mercies that all believers share.  It is as if Paul is saying to Philemon, “Continue to walk the talk Philemon.”  This is pretty clearly not a rebuke, but rather an encouragement to press on, to take every thought and every word captive for the sake of the call of the gospel.

Finally, note vs. seven.  Paul is in prison, unable to bring these letters personally.  He is in the presence of a guard 24/7.  It is surely with an anxious heart that he seals these letters, hands them off to his emissaries, trusting that they will make it to their destination. Yet in the midst of this he finds true comfort!  From what source?  It is because he knows that the hearts of the saints of God have been and will be refreshed by the kindness and serving heart of his dear friend Philemon.

Rabbit trail: One might wonder why this personal letter made it into the bible.  After all, we are given clues that Paul has written other letters that did not make it into the cannon of scripture.   And this letter seems like a personal matter, and don’t get me wrong, we are glad to have it, yes?   But there are a couple of clues that might help us see an unspoken depth of purpose.  First, in the first verse, this letter is to the church in Colossae, not simply to a person.  It is a public letter designed to be communicated and surely read to a wider audience.  I wonder if Philemon would have been a little bit embarrassed at that?  The second thing is that the issues surrounding slavery were and would increasingly become a matter worthy of bringing to the attention of the entire church.  After all, Philemon was not the only Christian in Colossae to own slaves.  How do we know this? Go to Colossians 4:1-4

Masters, treat your bondservants[a] justly and fairly, knowing that you also have a Master in heaven. Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving. At the same time, pray also for us, that God may open to us a door for the word, to declare the mystery of Christ, on account of which I am in prison— that I may make it clear, which is how I ought to speak.

B.   [8-16] The mirror of the gospel:

Accordingly, though I am bold enough in Christ to command you to do what is required, yet for love's sake I prefer to appeal to you—I, Paul, an old man and now a prisoner also for Christ Jesus— 10 I appeal to you for my child, Onesimus,[b] whose father I became in my imprisonment. 11 (Formerly he was useless to you, but now he is indeed useful to you and to me.) 12 I am sending him back to you, sending my very heart. 13 I would have been glad to keep him with me, in order that he might serve me on your behalf during my imprisonment for the gospel, 14 but I preferred to do nothing without your consent in order that your goodness might not be by compulsion but of your own accord. 15 For this perhaps is why he was parted from you for a while, that you might have him back forever, 16 no longer as a bondservant[c] but more than a bondservant, as a beloved brother—especially to me, but how much more to you, both in the flesh and in the Lord.

Note first that Paul is not a mere supplicant here!  Though he is old, though he is in prison, though he has no particular status in any community, he speaks to Philemon with the voice of authority.  He might command and receive obedience but he does not play that card.  He simply asks.  Not only that but he does not even ask for a particular course of action.  It is enough that he lays out the matter before Philemon, confident in his relational bond with this man, a fellow soldier in Christ. 

There are a number of things to highlight in this portion of the text.  First, notice that Paul adds another piece to his resume.  He is not only a prisoner, but he is old.  I once heard it suggested that Paul is in some way “pouring it on” by manipulating the heart strings of Philemon, and that has actually resonated with me over the years, and I have smiled at what at first appears to be an argument based on guilt or pity.  But I don’t think that can be the case.  The stakes are too high. The young man Onesimus may well be standing there with hat in hand as this letter is being read.  Paul is doing more than asking for a favor here, hoping to somehow sway the sympathies of this man of means, Philemon!  He is baring his heart.

In fact, we first see the word “heart” in vs. 12.  Paul says that he is sending his very heart back to Philemon.  He refers to Onesimus as his child and himself as his Father during Paul’s imprisonment.   How Paul would have longed to keep Onesimus by his side, to find encouragement and comfort in his assistance and to see that as a gift from Philemon.  And yet, it is important to Paul that accounts are square between these two beloved brothers. 

Further, do you see the similarity between vs 7 and vs 16?  Yes, in verse 7 Philemon is addressed as a brother to Paul.  And here in vs 16 it is Onesimus who is named as brother, a blessed brother.   And he sends him back to Philemon no longer as a slave, but as something so much more.  Paul outlines the chasm between the slave and what the slave has become.

Useless and now useful

In the flesh…. and forever in the Lord.

All that remains here is that Philemon should welcome Onesimus back and of his own will praise the Lord for the mercies of God in this matter. There is no need for compulsion here.  This is a moment of allowing a miraculous transformation to take place, to see Philemon begin to connect the dots. This will be a transformation in relationship that Paul does not need to somehow engineer! It will develop naturally because of the shared mercies of Christ poured out on each of these brothers.

I have called this section The Mirror of the gospel because Paul is modeling in his relationship with Onesimus the embodiment of the gospel. The love of Paul for this younger brother is tangible.  It breathes from the page. The reckoning that must take place is navigated by Paul to take place in such a way that any guilt of the escaped slave is washed away, not on the strength of character of Onesimus, but on the love of the spiritual father for the spiritual child. 

C.    Vs. 17-25       Blood brothers

So, if you consider me your partner, receive him as you would receive me. 18 If he has wronged you at all, or owes you anything, charge that to my account. 19 I, Paul, write this with my own hand: I will repay it—to say nothing of your owing me even your own self. 20 Yes, brother, I want some benefit from you in the Lord. Refresh my heart in Christ.  Confident of your obedience, I write to you, knowing that you will do even more than I say. 22 At the same time, prepare a guest room for me, for I am hoping that through your prayers I will be graciously given to you. 23 Epaphras, my fellow prisoner in Christ Jesus, sends greetings to you, 24 and so do Mark, Aristarchus, Demas, and Luke, my fellow workers.

                   The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ be with your spirit.

So, here’s a question.  If Paul himself had delivered this letter, how would he have been received? Think about that for a moment.  Would the guest room have been made ready?  I think so, and much more besides!  And here Paul suggests that it would be most fitting to welcome Onesimus back in the same way! Wow!  But Paul is not finished.  On the off chance that there might remain outstanding a delicate and troublesome matter of property gone missing, or perhaps the books having been cooked by an enterprising slave in a position to benefit…  Paul gives Philemon a blank check! [Dave Ramsey would be horrified!] 

 [The story of Cath and me and the “house account.”]

Again, the story becomes a mirror of the gospel.  Folks we have had a blank check applied to our balance due!  It’s not a thirty-dollar gift card.  It is a house account.  In the case of Philemon, the sum however great or small would count little against the mercies of God poured out in the lives of both of these men, not only in this world of flesh but for all eternity.  Note the final plea:  Refresh my heart in Christ.  Paul seeks no other benefit from Philemon.  He does not ask for a high-powered defense attorney.  He does not ask for strings to be pulled or for special treatment, or even for a martyr’s honor.  He only asks that the bonds between brothers be made strong because of the shed blood of Jesus that has washed both of them clean!

III. Takeaways:

  1. We see through a glass darkly:

    Like Paul and any of the characters in this story, we do not know what the future holds.  In fact, even when we look back on the year has just finished, who can say what the impact will be of even the smallest circumstance.  The point is that whether we are looking back at the year past, or forward to the New Year, we see through a glass darkly.  Paul spoke with acute confidence about events that he would have no control over at all.  How so?  Because his confidence is rooted not in knowing the future, but in knowing who holds the future.  To express confidence about a future outcome without basis is simply hubris.  Paul’s confidence rests on the proven faithfulness of God, his promised mercies and his faith in the word of God.  It was in that good soil that his hope was rooted.

  2. O to be of use!

     Never undersell the gift of being useful. Did you know what the name Onesimus means?  Yes, it means ‘useful!’  I have said it before from this pulpit, to be of use is perhaps the most satisfying of all gifts and it has little to do with recognition, fleeting fame or honor among men.  It has everything to do with genuine care for a brother or a sister.  It may well be the most reliable measuring stick of our growing maturity in Christ.   But there is a danger here, yes?  We will always tend to rank usefulness according to our own lights.  The key here is to understand that the real measuring stick is usefulness to God, not usefulness to me, and that introduces an entirely different metric to the calculation.  We used to joke that the spiritual gift in our family was to fill chairs!  And though said in jest, there was great truth in that statement.  And usefulness is not a measure of worth, unless it is also a measure of yieldedness to our Champion, Jesus Christ.

  3. Be on the lookout for your own blind spots!

    You surely have them!  Philemon certainly did.  Paul draws comfort from the grace that Philemon exhibits for all the saints.  And yet, it seems that Onesimus was invisible to him.  He sees Onesimus not for who he is, a minister and an emissary of the gospel, a blood brother in Christ, a growing man of increasing usefulness…  He sees this presumably younger man whom he no longer really even knows, as a slave, a run-away slave, and as property returned.   He had the resources to have manumitted this bondservant and sent him with a blessing to minister on his behalf to his own spiritual father, the Apostle Paul.  And maybe in the end, he did.  It is comforting to know that even our blind spots will one day by the transformative work of Holy Spirit in our lives, resolve themselves into clarity of vision and renewed sight.  Praise the Lord!  But until then the question remains.... Who is invisible to you and me?  Where is your blind spot?  Where is mine?

Conclusion: Three strikes and you’re out?

Onesimus did not have two strikes against him.  He had three!  He was a slave.  He was an escaped slave.  He was discovered and brought back to his owner.  He was surely not brought back in chains, but he was entirely at the mercy of one whom by the lights of his day, he had wronged.

But…

Onesimus had a champion, his spiritual Father the apostle Paul.  Would you find comfort in knowing that you have a champion who will vouch for you, fight for you, who will cover the cost of all your debts, all your mixed bag of “broken ware” to borrow Hawthorne’s words, envy, broken promises and disappointments?  Brothers and Sisters, in Christ, you do!  And we proclaim this Champion to one another each Sunday, and every day in between.  And know this, that we have a champion who loves us, personally and deeply.

“How strange and divine I can say Christ is mine.  Yet not I but Christ in me!” 

Further, the word of our champion is a word of authority and power. It does not have to somehow cajole or seek to strategically persuade via guilt or pity or sheer cheekiness,  a reluctant judge and jury on our behalf.   The word of Jesus Christ spoken for you and me, attested to by his broken body and shed blood, by his triumph over death, and his fellowship with the Father and the Holy Spirit, is heard and attended to by the whirling stars of the farthest galaxy!  It spoke the world into existence.  He has been our champion from before the foundation of the world.  If this is new to you.  If you feel like you have never had a champion,  that you are alone in the world with two,  or maybe even three, strikes against you,  I ask you to join with us as we march with growing confidence into the New Year,  yielded and surrendered to the Lord Jesus Christ,  who knows everything about us, and yet who loves us still. And may we rest in this brothers and sisters, that though we have no idea of what 2024 may bring, we know the one who holds the future in the palm of his hand.

NEXT SUNDAY: What Is the Church? Part 1: The People of God, 1 Peter 2:9–12